I would accept the fact. I am cheap. I somehow am not able to reconcile with the fact that I need to spend 25 USD (1100 INR) to travel 8 miles on a taxi or 50 USD for a t-shirt or 40 USD for a dinner, where I end up not eating most of the stuff. The cheapest t-shirt (the one I would want to wear) costs 1500 INR, even though I compromise on design, colour, and even fabric. GAP displays a shirt for 98 USD (4400 INR). It has a “Made in India” label on it. A friend who accompanies me buys a 650 USD watch for his fiancee. Back home things are cheap. In 1500 INR I could possibly get the best available t-shirt. Here the same priced t-shirt gets a Hmmmmmmm! and a Not bad! comment.

So what, if we do not have brands like FCUK or ARMANI? I am happy with the brands we have. Or the no brands at Fashion Street (Mumbai), Sarojini Nagar (Delhi). They are worth for what they cost. At times even more. Once I bought a Timberland shirt for mere 100 INR from a street vendor. Probably the shirt had some manufacturing defect, which was not discernible to a common human eye.

I had heard US is cheap. But I find it otherwise here. Last night I pampered myself and had a dinner which cost me 40 USD, excluding the tip. A dinner for one. It was at one of the 5-star restaurants, and as I said, I ended up not eating most of the stuff. So what’s the big deal? I would probably pay the same amount in an Indian 5-star restaurant. But there I could take a 5-minute walk and find a much cheaper restaurant, where I would pay 10 times less for a sumptuous meal. Even if I would have to take a taxi/auto/local train to find a cheap restaurant, it would be worth it. I would end up spending less anyways. Here, we do have cheap restaurants or joints. But I would need to spend 10USD or probably even more to reach the place. And another 10 USD to come back to my hotel. My hotel is located in one of the suave places of US. For me there is no difference.

But I still do it. And I still am here. Doing things I am cribbing about. Hypocrisy! eh?

The Waiting

I wait for the train to arrive. In the sweating heat, you are the only solace. I hold your hands for fear of being lost amongst hundreds of passengers. It’s my being lost is what I fear. You laugh at me. I glow with your warmth. I touch your brow. The jade bangle looks good on you. Bluish green bangle on your green dress. It’s hot and I am all sweaty. But you glow with a freshness which separates you from the rest. I like watching you. I know it would not be long. And still I hope it stays the way it is. The crowd is busy with itself. There is an undercurrent of excitement which is faintly discernible. I feel it. And you give me a nod, as if in approval. Silently, you turn your back. For once, you would not watch me go. It is painful you say. Left all alone in the midst of everyone. The train would arrive any moment now…